KEVIN Federline insists his breakup from Britney Spears caused him to gain weight. The former backup dancer says the stress of being associated with the Toxic hitmaker made him pile on the pounds and led to his subsequent appearance on  VH1’s Celebrity Fit Club. “Me and Brit are good now. Everybody knows I’ve had a tough road [...]

So: E!'s running this story today about Justin Timberlake accepting Harvard's Man of the Year award—called the Hasty Pudding award, apparently—and it appears to be part of some joyously homoerotic Ivy League ritual of fun. It looks awesome.

Hasty Pudding Theatricals is, according to Wikipedia (natrually):

...a theatrical student society at Harvard University, known for its burlesque musicals and for its status as the oldest collegiate theatrical organization in the United States.

And every year they have a "Woman of the Year" and a "Man of the Year" award, in which they have a roast, a parade, and a show for the honorees. Timberlake and Anne Hathaway were honored this year. Jessica Biel showed up with Timberlake. And in the skit, apparently, someone played Britney Spears, Madonna, and Chris Kirkpatrick. We also learned he apparently digs drag:

"Funny enough, every time I've hosted SNL I've ended up in drag at least once," the good sport said of his getup during his toast. "I love stuff like this."

Well then! So, uh, there's that. Via Getty Images, enjoy the rapture of Harvard nonsense and what a very elite, expensive tuition bill actually gets you: one of the world's most famous pop stars, in drag. If anybody has video of the fun, we'd love to see it.

BRITNEY Spears has sparked concern she’s on the verge of another mental breakdown — after reportedly freaking out following a recent court appearance. The Toxic singer reacted badly when she realized she may never get from under her father Jamie’s strict conservatorship. “When Britney and Jamie arrived home, she screamed at him and carried on like a [...]

Hayden Panettiere's heavyweight boxer boyfriend forces us to confront our ageist, sizeist assumptions. Sandra Bullock would trade her Oscar nod for a dog. Jersey Shore contemplates Fashion Week. Holy crap, is Britney pregnant again? Wednesday gossip is not to scale.

• Is it sizeist to say this picture of the cheerleader from Heroes and her enormous heavyweight boxer boyfriend freaks me out? Is it ageist to say I find a 20-year-old former child star's relationship with a 33-year-old professional pugilist somewhat icky? If she wants an older man publicity relationship, why not check Gerard Butler out of the boyfriend library? That any agent would orchestrate a fake relationship with Ukranian professional boxer is perhaps the strangest conceit of all. Unless, of course, this is real. In which case Hayden Panettiere has inexplicable taste in men. Milo Ventimiglia, then this? [JJ]
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• Jersey Shore has accomplished the unthinkable: At least three designers have inted cast members to sit—or model—at the upcoming New York Fashion Week. The Greatest Sociological Experiment of Our Time is officially complete, and Team: MTV Schadenfreude won. Anna Wintour is going to strangle a bitch. Nina Garcia questions America's taste level. [P6]
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• Brittany Murphy's public memorial is "mysteriously on hold." Husband-turned-interview salesman Simon Monjack was going to use it to raise funds for his new Brittany Murphy Foundation this Thursday at the Beverly Hills Temple of the Arts, but "postponed." Reason unknown. [TMZ]
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• Britney Spears is back in the recording studio and inviting pregnancy rumors with a tight white dress. Does the Starbcks cup in her hand debunk it? Only if you believe she has some sense of prenatal responsibility. [Superficial]
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• Sandra Bullock's husband's dog CinnaBun ran away, and Sandy "would give anything—including her Oscar nomination—to get little CinnaBun back." Understandable. That's one cute dog. [NBN]
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• Gerard Butler is done fake-dating Jennifer Aniston. He's on to rebounding Reese Witherspoon now, says Star. "Is Gerard Butler just on standby for when you need to appear not frigid?" asks Lainey Gossip. [LG]
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• But wait! Reese was spotted running errands with "a very tall friend." What is with all these monstrously tall boyfriends? Unless everyone is dating their bodyguards? [JJ]
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• Michael Jackson's dead giraffes are not resting in peace: JJ and Rambo were exhumed and reburied after townspeople near their original resting place complained that they could smell their long necks rotting. (The belated excavation of two rotting giraffes is among the grosser things I have ever imagined.) For good measure, the townspeople filed suit to evict Jacko's suriving giraffes, Annie Sue and Princess, from the Arizona wildlife preserve they border. [TMZ]
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• Ne-Yo condemned Chris Brown for beating Rihanna. Better one year late than never? [P6]
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• Randy Jackson is getting sued because Randy Jackson Presents America's Best Dance Crew might not have been his idea. A guy named Dwight McGhee says MTV stole his 2004 pitch for an International Breakerz League. (1.) Puh-leeze. (2.) Even if the formula's obvious? ABDC is good. I hereby declare it would be less good if its name had a 'z' in it. [TMZ]
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• Claire Danes has purple hair. It's probably for a role. It's as ugly as you fear. [TMZ]
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• The horror, the horror: A celebrity was accidentally seated in business class instead of first. Since it was Kanye West, it's funny. He threw a tantrum and got bumped up. [P6]
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Ugh, that OUTFIT — but we like the yellow bag!

Britney Spears and boyfriend Jason Trawick caught a flight out of LAX this afternoon.

Where are Jayden and Sean? Maybe the happy couple is heading out for a romantic getaway alone?

[Image via GSI Media.]

Good for her!

Cutie Pie Taylor Swift showed Brit Brit how it's done when she broke girlfriend's record for the best download debut by a female artist with her adorable new single "Today Was a Fairytale."

The track, which is on the soundtrack for Swift's film acting debut Valentine's Day, was downloaded 325,000 times in the past week - which is 39,000 more than Brit's comeback single "Womanizer" in 2008!!!! Holy shiz!!!

Unfortunately, the track is second only to Ke$ha's "TiK ToK" on the Billboard Hot 100. Boo.

Okay, we get it, Ke$ha's catchy, but at least T-Swift doesn't look like she's seizuring out of some gutter in Seaside Heights, NJ 24/7!!!

Time to hand the throne over to Queen T!!!

[Image via WENN.]

Former US Weekly editor Janice Min got a book deal to write From Mousewife to Momshell: The Rules and Celebrity Secrets for Being a Thinner, Younger, and Sexier Mom. What a great idea! We'd like to propose some entries.

1: Always dress like your daughter. You always want people to wonder whether you're actually SISTERS! [Photo of Taylor Momsen and her mom Collette: Getty.]

2: Introduce your children to fame as early as possible. For example, put the four-month-old baby in your lap while driving down the Pacific Coast Highway, instead of strapping it into a car seat. This will also remind everyone that you are footloose and fancy-free.

3: Hang out with the youth. This can easily be accomplished by taking your daughter to clubs. Also, tell everyone you were a former Rockette (they will think you are limber and athletic). When your older daughter seems to really go off the deep end, start hanging out with your younger daughter, whom everyone had hopes might be the "normal one."

4: Be honest about drug use. It's best if they learn that mommies make mistakes, too. After a hidden video camera catches you snorting coke at a club, act vaguely contrite when the news is splashed all over the tabloids. It will help if you don't lose too many of your lucrative modeling contracts.

5: Always make your ex-husband look bad: Leak the nasty voicemail your ex-husband left your 12-year-old daughter to TMZ and then breezily deny knowledge of it.

6: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. This can be accomplished by referring to Susan Boyle as "looking like a hairy arsehole."

[All photos via Getty]

We do not want a Mel Gibson comeback, but the universe doesn't care because Mel Gibson just landed another starring role. Katie Holmes also might make a comeback, and George Lucas writes a musical about fairies. All inside the Roundup!

•Mel "batshit insane" Gibson is in talks to star in Universal's Cold Warrior a film penned by Shane Black who wrote Lethal Weapon. This of course comes right before the opening of Edge of Darkness on Friday. But where Gibson financed that film himself, Cold Warrior would mark the first major studio-backed pic to star Gibson since he was arrested for drunk driving and being an anti-Semitic idiot. Let's hope he's at least still a good actor. (Gibson is also starring in the upcoming Jodie Foster film "The Beaver". Jokes!) [Variety]

•Mel Gibson is old and busted, but Zac Efron is just hitting is prime, seems like: The Disney creation has been signed to Universal's Fire, an action flick based on a graphic novel. He's also signed a deal at Warner Bros. to star in a project. Will he be able to hold onto his kiddie stardom long enough to become the next big drunken anti Semitic thing? Or will he dissolve back into the primordial tween ooze from which he sprung? [Deadline]

•Speaking of young actors, remember when Katie Holmes was that hot girl from Dawson's Creek and you went to see The Gift just because she had a nude scene it it? Then she morphed into Tom Cruise's Wife and sort of disappeared into the land of E-meters. But now, she might be making a comeback. The LA Times just saw Holmes' performance in Romantics at Sundance, and are now asking if she's a "newly minted dramatic star?" [LAT]

•George Lucas thought he'd take a break from ruining Star Wars to write a CGI musical about fairies. Kevin Monroe (TMNT) is directing the film, which Lucas will exec produce, about which nothing is known except it features fairies. But that's enough for us. [THR]

•In a throwback to the genius stunt they pulled in having mid-breakdown Britney Spears guest star back in 2008, Jennifer Lopez has been scheduled to guest star on a March episode of How I Met Your Mother Of course, she's not going to be a big draw as Spears. But Lopez is also in talks to guest star in an episode of Glee. [THR]

•Yet another baby guide is being made into a film. This time it's Eat, Sleep, Poop: A Common Sense Guide to Your Baby's First Year It's being adapted into a comedy by Matt Allen and Caleb Wilson, who wrote Four Christmases. [THR]

Filed under: Celebrity Justice, Britney Spears, K-Fed, Exclusives

TMZ.com: Britney Spears and Kevin Federline still have one huge asset to settle -- according to the Louisiana State Dept. of Revenue, the government owes the ex-couple over $50,000 from when they were still married.The money is from an unclaimed interest fund ... Read more

We're not sure we buy it!

K-Fat K-Fed claims his weight gain was caused by depression, NOT a pathetic ploy to get publicity and land a spot on Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp!

The Former Mr. Brit Brit says:

“Once you get depressed, you don’t really feel like doing anything. You’re kind of discouraged about yourself and then the weight gain too, or that makes me more depressed. I mean, it’s a combination of all of those things.”

If it were coming from a normal, well-adjusted person and not a fame-whoring douchebag, we would suppose it makes sense.

And what brought on this depression, you might ask?

"A number of things between, I mean, everybody knows what happened with me and Brit. I’m not going to say that’s the total cause of it but, I mean, just not being happy with myself was probably the main part of my depression.”

Uh…yeah. Makes more sense now. Being depressed because you effed up a lifetime meal ticket! That must have been a DEVASTATING loss.

Thankfully, K-Fed is feeling much better now that he has publicity and may want to produce another shiteous album more kids!

"I’ll let the young ones grow up first and we’ll see.”

Ugh! Haven't you traumatized the ones you already have enough?!

[Image via WENN.]